Brains on the Half Skull

2 good-sized Potatoes (washed, unpeeled)
8 oz Thin Spaghetti
14 oz Spaghetti Sauce

Microwave potatoes until they are done.  Meanwhile, cook your spagetti, drain.  When the potatoes are done, cut in half, scoop out most of the middles (put aside for later use).  Heat the sauce and combine cooked spaghetti to make brains.  Put a scoop of bloody brains in each skull.  Sprinkle with Parmesan Cheese, serve.

(Adapted from

Sewer Soda

1 qt Chocolate chocolate chip ice Cream
Chocolate syrup
1 liter Club soda

Let ice cream sit at room temperature until it is easy to scoop.  Spoon halfway up into iced tea glasses.  Pour about 3 tablespoons chocolate syrup into each glass.  Slowly fill almost to the top with club soda, stir well.  Serve with a straw and tall spoon for excavating those luscious brown lumps.  Serves 4 sewage slurpers.

Sicko serving suggestion: To make this slop especially disgusting, plop an unwrapped tootsie roll into each glass.

Adapted from:  Gross Grub, by Cheryl Porter, Random House

Toasted Tongues

6 Egg whites
1 cup Sugar
Red food coloring
Marshmallow Creme (optional)

Position oven rack on the lowest shelf, preheat oven to 200 degrees F.   Separate yolks from eggwhite (freeze yolks for another use, another time).  Beat the eggs until they form stiff peaks. Slowly stir spoonfuls of sugar into the whites and continue to beat until the entire cup of sugar has been added; the whites should now form stiff, shiny peaks.  Add two to three drops of red food coloring.  Place a sheet of parchment paper on a cookie sheet.

To form tongues:  Spoon about 3 tablespoons of meringue in the shape of a tongue onto the parchment paper.  Tongues should be the length of the popsicle sticks. Press a popsicle stick gently into the center of the tongue, leaving about 2" of stick hanging out.

Bake about 3 hours or until tongues are completely dry to the touch.  Allow to cool completely before carefully lifting them off the paper.  Makes about 12 little lickers.

Sicko serving suggestion: To serve coated tongues, use a toothpick to spread a thin layer of mucus (marshmallow topping) down the length of them.

From:  Gross Grub, by Cheryl Porter, Random House

Tortured Tomatoes with Bird Dropping Dressing

2 lg Ripe Tomatoes
2 tb Crumbled Blue Cheese
Roquefort Dressing

Cut Tomatoes into half inch slices, place in plastic bag.  Squeeze out any extra air, close the bag tightly.  Lay bag flat on the counter and with your fist, gentle pound them until they look "tortured"  Divide the tortured tomatoe slices among four bowls and sprinkle with a half tablespoon of crumbled cheese.  Then, holding a spoon at least 12 inches from the salad bowl (to approximate the altitude of a low flying bird), dribble a glob of dressing onto each one.

Adapted from:  Gross Grub, by Cheryl Porter, Random House

NOTE:  Very dry, cooked rice (long-grain) makes excellent "maggots" upon which the tomato slices can be served.


THE COOKIE PART:  To make this easier for the busy Hostess, we have allowed ourself to purchase rolls of cookie dough, plain (yellow), chocolate, and/or  chocolate chip).  Shape dough into little rolls a bit thicker than a pencil and form into turd-like shapes (i.e., roughly the shape of an "S" or spirals--taper the ends).  Use your imagination.  You can roll them in cocoa powder before baking according to package direction, or keep coating your hands in cocoa powder while working the dough.  They can also be rolled in chopped nuts or "wormed" with Coconut Flakes, or dipped in cinnamon sugar.  Or, when they have cooled, drizzle with melted chocolate or almond bark (if desired).  The nastier they look, the better!

TO SERVE:  You can either purchase an inexpensive litterbox, or if you have access to a good-sized box-lid (about 3 inches deep), you can line this with brown paper (cut and flatten grocery sacks, glue to the box), then line the whole thing with plastic wrap (for sanitation), or cover with tinfoil (tape foil to box at the bottom).  Fill about half full with Grape Nuts cereal and mix in any or all of the following:  Raisins (regular and/or chocolate-covered), Chocolate Chips (use regular, milk chocolate, white and butterscotch for best effect), add some Ramen and/or Chow Mein noodles for a real gross-out (worms!!!!), sweetened coconut flakes, maybe even unwrapped (bite-sized) Tootsie Rolls.  If you want to get real fancy, buy a bunch of M&Ms but pick out only the brown ones to add to the mess.  Again, let your imagination go wild!  Mix in the cookies.  Decorate with plastic flies if desired.   A litter-box scoop (freshly purchased!!!! *LOL*) is essential for effect ... and for  scooping out the goodies.

It's been in the family for many years.
watch what you dance with!
Halloween Treats
Poor Kitty!
Something spooky going on here ... the cat's been turned into a candy dish!!!  Uh oh!
Guess the only thing to do is fill her with treats :-)

Go ahead ....


Maggot Delight

Per serving:
prepare enough long-grain Rice to have 1/2 to 3/4 cup per serving
Rice Milk  (i.e., Rice Dream brand, plain or vanilla flavoured)
(to taste)
(ad lib)
Apple slivers, Lemon Juice 
Lettuce Leaves
Gummy Worms
(a few per serving for decoration)

Cook Rice in Rice Milk according to package directions (the finished product should be dry and fluffy).  Lightly sweeten with Sugar; if using non-flavoured Rice Milk, also add a few drops of Vanilla Extract.  Let cool.  Add some Raisins.  If using Apple, chop a small unpeeled one into little slivers, sprinkle with Lemon Juice to prevent discolouration, add to the mixture.

To serve: Heap 1/2 to 3/4 cup on lettuce leaf ("nibble" the edges of the lettuce  in a few places), it should look a bit "untidy".  Decorate each serving with a gummy worm.  If using Grapes for decoration, poke a little hole or two into each one and halfway insert a grain of Rice each to resemble a maggot enjoying a snack.  Oh Yumm!!! *LOL*

NOTES:  1) Tastes good warm or cold.  2) Rice Milk is ideal for cooking rice (or other cooked cereals) because it will not stick to the pot or burn like cows milk.  3) This dish does taste best when flavoured with cinnamon but the colour would interfere with the white maggot look, keep a little shaker handy so everyone can flavour to their own liking.

Adapted from "Valkyrie's Vegetarian Concoctions, Breakfast"
How about shaking a leg next?
Follow the lil' Witch in evening gown the to the Back Garden:
watch what you dance with!